3. FRIEND

Henry Law


"This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend, O daughters of Jerusalem."—Song of Solomon 5:16

Such is the language of the rapturous spouse. After enumeration of the charms of the spiritual Bridegroom, the boast cannot be restrained, "This is my Friend!" This is He whom my heart loves, my chief delight, my joy, my glory, my all.

The utterance of the collective body expresses the feeling of each component part. Every true believer exults in this happy portion, "This is my Friend."

The very name of friendship sounds as a melodious note. To hear it, is to receive pleasure. It is a theme which has awakened the poet's sweetest song; and on it moralists have instructively enlarged. The glowing pen has rapturously extolled it as the charm of life, the solace of the earthly pilgrimage, the balm of sorrow, the delight of early days, the prop of declining age, the unchanging joy in every changing scene. It is a true saying, Happy is the man who has a friend. He possesses what wealth could never purchase, what prosperity could never really win. What then shall be said of his supreme felicity who can in truth assert, My Friend is Jesus, the "King of kings, and Lord of lords;" "God over all, blessed forevermore;" "the chief among ten thousand, the altogether lovely One"—the Lord who has all power in heaven and in earth, who wields the scepter of universal sway, in whom is "no variableness, neither shadow of turning;" who loves with an everlasting love, who hates divorce! This is the believer's privilege. Without presumption he can boast, "This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend."

Let this grand truth be now approached by an analysis of some PROPERTIES OF FRIENDSHIP.

I. Mutual knowledge. This feeling can only breathe in the region of thorough acquaintance. It cannot live in hearts estranged and unfamiliar. We may take interest in strangers, and view them with respect and kindness; but friendship requires far nearer fellowship. To cement this union, heart must hold converse with heart—freely, fully, and unreservedly. Mind must have access to mind, and hold the key of intimate communion.

Such is the blessed oneness between Jesus and His friends. His lips declare, "I know My sheep, and am known of Mine." (John 10:14) This knowledge must be His, because omniscience is His property. The Psalmist truly says, "O Lord, You have searched me, and known me. You know my down-sitting and my up-rising. You understand my thoughts afar off. You compass my path, and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, You know it altogether." (Psa. 139:1-4)

Surely shame must fill the heart, and confusion must depress the head, when reflection shows our natural condition. The penetrating glance of Jesus surveys the whole. "His eyes are as a flame of fire." (Rev. 1:14) Daily provocations bid Him turn with abhorrence from the chief of believers; but He knows, and still He loves. How can this be! The answer is the Gospel's glory. He loves because He will love. His nature and His name import that He is love. No moving cause can be discerned, but in the depths of His own heart, and in His purposes to redeem and save. While His thorough knowledge tends to alienate, He still loves.

But His all-seeing eye observes not only evil's course, He notes the tears which bedew the cheek of penitence. He hears each sigh from the sin-stricken heart. His ears are open to every wrestling prayer. Each sound of praise flies swiftly to His ear. Every cry for pardoning mercy, every confession of guilt, each supplication for help, each call for guidance, each avowal of need, ascend to His mercy-seat. Job utters the consolatory truth, "He knows the way that I take." (Job 23:10) Each epistle to the Churches (Rev. 2) commences with the assurance, "I know your works." The movement of the believing heart is spread as an open page before Him. The budding, the bloom, the ripening, the fruit of every grace, the origin, the advance of every good word and work, are clear before Him. It cannot be otherwise, for all are the planting of His hand, the produce of His will and power.

Thus He knows His people. They, also, in part know Him. Now, indeed, they "see through a glass darkly; but then face to face." (1 Cor. 13:12) Now their faculties are dim, but "when He shall appear, they shall be like Him; for they shall see Him as He is." (1 John 3:2) But by the enlightening rays of the Holy Spirit He has so revealed Himself, that the believer may profess, "I know whom I have believed." (2 Tim. 1:12) Faith clearly sees the glories of His person, the tenderness of His heart, the plenitude of His unchanging grace, the accomplishment of His finished work, the power of His unceasing intercession, His sufficiency and willingness "to save to the uttermost all who come unto God by Him." (Heb.7:25) Believers daily grow in this knowledge. The book which portrays the lineaments of His features and the transcript of His character is their constant study. Thus is the knowledge strengthened which is the basis of true friendship. Realizing this mutual acquaintance, the believer professes, "This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend."

II. Friendship requires congeniality of tastes. The friend must love what the friend loves, and dislike what the friend dislikes. "How can two walk together, except they are agreed?" (Amos 3:3) It is true that by nature there is immeasurable alienation, infinite discrepancy, boundless estrangement between heaven and earth's inhabitants. The natural heart is conceived in sin, and shaped in enmity to God. But Jesus, by His Spirit's power, takes the stony heart out of the flesh, softens the rocky hardness, melts the obduracy, converts the ice into a glowing furnace. He creates a new heart. He infuses a right spirit. He forms a new being, lovely in righteousness, radiant in true holiness, modeled after the image of God. Light replaces midnight-darkness. Beauteous order smiles where chaos once frowned. The new-born believer is no more his own. Christ sits on the throne of his affections. His conduct is in heaven. His delight is in the law of his Lord; its righteousness is his main pursuit. His every desire is intermixed with Christ. His inner man is in consonance with Christ's will. Thus entire oneness rules. Hence a grand ingredient in friendship is established, and the believer truly boasts, "This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend."

III. Community of interests. This is a requisite of friendship. A friend is interwoven in his friend's concerns. What treasures of delight are contained in the truth, that Jesus and all He is, and all He has, is the sure property of His people! His abode on earth was theirs, that He might be their Surety, their Proxy, their Substitute. He died that they might not die eternally. He lives forever, that endless life may be their heritage. He reigns on high, that all things may be ordered for their good. His power is theirs to guard and to defend. His angels are theirs to encamp, as a garrison around. His throne is theirs, that they may sit forever by His side. Thus the believer realizes, "I am my Beloved's, and my Beloved is mine:" (Song 6:3) As the bridegroom endows the bride, so Jesus calls His friends to share His every possession.

So, also, the believer's interests are centered in Christ, and in Christ's kingdom. This all-absorbing feeling burns mightily. When Christ is magnified, honored, glorified, the joy of His friends is at its height. When Christ is scorned, vilified, neglected, crowned again with thorns, and crucified afresh, their spirit is depressed. To them truly "to live is Christ." (Phil. 1:21) It is their labor and delight to make known the glories of His name, and to bear witness to His praise. Their lips are warm to call sinners to His cross. Their steps are glad to seek the abodes of ignorance and vice, that they may allure, invite, and win to the service, which is perfect freedom and overflowing bliss. By all the means within their power they help the missionary cause. By self-denying efforts, by incessant prayer, they strive that Christ may be "known on earth, His saving health among all nations." Thus they testify, "This is our beloved, and this is our Friend." Our cause is His, His cause is ours. Our prosperity and peace and joy are the objects of His care. His glory is our main concern.

IV. Confidence. Between friends there is firm trust. This is preeminently true of Christ and His people. The believer trusts his Lord in all things for time and for eternity. Is it said of our heavenly Father, that "He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?" (Rom. 8:32) This is the believer's confidence. Christ gave Himself for me, how shall He not also freely give me all things?

We may not deny that man is born to trouble; the path through life is strewn with thorns. Believers reach heaven through much tribulation, and the thought will sometimes perplex: If I am His, why am I thus? His over-ruling hand could avert all sorrow, and crown me at each moment with loving-kindness and tender mercies. But these mists of doubt soon vanish. The deep and abiding persuasion is settled in the soul, "Though He slays me, yet will I trust in Him." (Job 13:15) There is no real apprehension that trials are evidence of desertion. The truth is engraved on the tablets of the mind, "I will never leave you, nor forsake you." (Heb. 13:5) "For a small moment have I forsaken you; but with great mercies will I gather you." (Isa. 54:7) The Spirit's voice echoes through the heart, "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." (Rom. 8:35, 37)

Unwavering is this confidence. It is founded on the immovable rock of the Word, on the vast roll of precious promises, on the review of happy experiences, on the recording pillars which gratitude has erected along the route of past days. There could be no firm friendship without this confidence; but bold in this confidence, the believer shouts, "This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend."

Other properties of friendship might be viewed. They would all appear in lovely train, consolidating the truth that Jesus is the "Friend who sticks closer than a brother." (Prov. 18:24) The believer, knowing this well, cherishes among his richest treasures the assurance, "Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knows not what his lord does: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you." (John 15:15)

The contrast cannot be hidden. How dreary and cheerless is the path of life unsolaced by a friend! But sadder far is that man's state who knows not Jesus as his own. His life is as the day which has no sun—as weakness with no sustaining staff—as sorrow with no sympathy—as solitude with no relief.

But why should any pine without this Friend! Behold! He stands at the door and knocks. His constant cry is, Open to Me; I am waiting to come in. Friendship may be cemented which no circumstances can impair or change. Distance or countless hindrances may part earthly friends. In sickness or in trouble the sigh may swell, Oh! that a visit from my friend might cheer; but impossibilities may intervene. Jesus is a Friend ever near. His presence may ever soothe the aching breast, and be a downy pillow for the dying head. Other friends may prove inconstant, or even false. Too many have been as the summer brook or early dew. Death may tear the loved one from our side. But Jesus ever lives and ever loves. Is it not happiness to boast, "This is my Beloved, and this is my Friend!"