Forget Your Father's House
Thomas Boston, 1676–1732
Psalm 45:10, "Forget also your own people, and your father's house."THIS is the second advice given to the spouse of Christ, in order to the pleasing of her husband, namely, that for him, she renounce all that formerly was dearer to her than he was. The advice is delivered in figurative terms, and in it there is a plain allusion to that law of marriage, Genesis 2:24, by which married persons are obliged to prefer their relatives to their natural parents, in point of affection and interest. When a woman is single, and at home in her father's house, her affection runs strongest to her father's family. Her interest is joined with theirs, and she conforms herself to them. But being married, her husband and his family takes the place with her; her affection must run strongest towards her husband and his family.
The advice, I think, is equivalent to that, "That you put off, concerning the former conversation, the old man, which is corrupt, according to the deceitful lusts." Or that, "as obedient children, not fashioning yourselves according to the former lusts in your ignorance." As if he had said, seeing you are now espoused to Christ, bring not your old manners and ways into your new state, but forsake and forget them, and behave no more as your father's daughter, but as Christ's spouse. In the words there is,
1. The natural relations of Christ's spouse pointed at, in contradistinction to those of her husband. She wants not relations, indeed, but they are such as she can have no credit nor good from them, but will be the worse of them, and therefore her husband has taken her out from among them, and would have her to forget them.
She has some that are her natural country people, her own people. Who are these, but the world that lies in wickedness; and before she was espoused to Christ, she was one of their own, but he has chosen her out of the world. Every country has its own fashions, and in former times she followed the fashions of the country as well as the rest.
She has also a father's house in that country. Who is her father naturally but the devil? John 8:44, and though she has left the house, yet he keeps house there still, with his children and servants; Luke 15:15. It denotes the state of unregeneracy, which men are in while in the black state of nature, out of which, when they are brought to Christ, they are brought as it were out of their father's house. Every house has its own fashions, and Christ's spouse followed the fashion of the house as well as others, while she was in it.
2. There is the duty of Christ's spouse with respect to these. She must forget them, both of them. And here there is something supposed, that is, that Christ's spouse is apt to have a hankering after her own people and father's house, even after she has left them, as Laban alleged that Jacob sore longed after his father's house. There may be eager looks back again, while the soul minds them, and that with too much affection, not sufficiently weaned from them.
There is something also expressed, that Christ's spouse ought to forget them. Not absolutely, for she not only may, but ought to mind them for her own humiliation and thankfulness. "For we ourselves also, were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, and hating one another." But in respect of affection, her heart must be weaned from them, she must not desire to return to them; and in respect of practice, she must no more conform herself to them. She must forget also her people, must not conform herself to the world. Rom, 12:2. She must forget also her father's house, her former lusts in her ignorance. A man's country is dear to him, but his father's house is dearer. So what is dearest to us in the world, must be forsaken for Christ.
DOCTRINE 1. The hearts of those espoused to Christ, are often found much unweaned from their father's house and former lusts, therefore is she taught to forget them. As it is with a childish new married woman, they have a foolish hankering after the house from which they came.
I. I shall show in what this unweanedness appears.
II. Whence it is that those who are espoused to Christ are so much unweaned from, and cannot forget their father's house and former lusts. We are then,
I. To show in what this unweanedness from their father's house and former lusts appears.
1. In the cooling of our zeal against our father's house, and the fashions thereof. Our husband's house and our father's are at war with each other; and this war is zealously prosecuted on both sides, by Michael and the dragon. When Christ's spouse then remits her zeal against sin, she appears partial in favor of her father's house. Christ finds fault with her, because "she has left her first love." And so far as she is not with Christ, in prosecuting the quarrel vigorously, she is so far against him. So far as she is not gathering with him, she is scattering abroad. But O! how quickly does the heart harden, and how soon does sin turn from being such a frightful spectacle, as it was before, and at the espousals.
2. In kindly reflections on the entertainment in our father's house, remembering with any delight or pleasure our former ways. The Israelites were not sufficiently weaned from the house of their bondage in Egypt, and they gave evidence of this by weeping, and saying, "who shall give us flesh to eat." We should never reflect on our former evil ways, but with shame and sorrow; but often, by kindly reflecting on these things, we as it were return to our vomit. And the looking back on them stirs up love, not loathing.
3. In uneasiness under the restraints of our husband's house, saying, with the Israelites, "here there is nothing at all besides this manna, before our eyes." A heart used to sinful liberty, cannot easily take up with the restraint. The soul used to gadding abroad, will not easily become a keeper at home. But were the soul duly weaned, it would be very easy under all the holy restraints of the house of Heaven, and would find a free walk within the inclosure of the divine law. The soul will say with David, "I will walk at liberty, for I seek your precepts."
4. In hankering after our father's house, and former lusts, in our hearts turning back to Egypt. Nothing can be more plain evidence, than these rueful looks to our old lusts. This was the fault of Lot's wife, for which she was turned into a pillar of salt, yet it is most incident to the children of men. When Adam was in paradise, his heart was hankering after the forbidden fruit; and though Christ brings sinners into a paradise on earth, yet they are still greedily looking over the hedge.
5. In kindly entertaining any sent from our father's house; by this people express their old kindness to the house. Our father, as long as we are in the world, will be sending to us; we will not want messengers of Satan, even temptations to our old sins; but if we were duly weaned from the house, we would deny them; we would deny ungodliness and worldly lusts. We would do with them, as Elisha did with the messenger whom the king of Israel sent to take away his head; we would shut the door, and hold them fast at the door, saying, Is not the sound of their master's feet behind them.
But alas! they are readily received, they are welcomed and fed by us, according to their kind. 2 Samuel 12:4.
6. In serving our husband after the fashion of our father's house; like a new married woman, who though she has changed the house, yet she keeps the fashions of that from which she came. So though the man will not neglect prayer, hearing, and other duties, yet he is so far unweaned, that he performs these often only as they do who are still in his father's house. This our Lord peremptorily discharges: "When you pray," says he, "you shall not be as the hypocrites are." He will have his own work done after the fashion of his own house.
7. In our stealing visits to our father's house, and secret tampering with former lusts. Stealing it must be, for our Lord and Husband will never give his consent to the meeting again. Ezekiel 6:9. But alas! how often is Christ's spouse missed out of her husband's house; her Lord is seeking her, but she is not at home, but gadding abroad, even lying in the embraces of former lusts and lovers. And though the soul that is truly married, will never rest there, but return to her first husband, Hosea 2:7, yet that woeful departing is a sad appearance of a heart unweaned from former lovers.
Lastly, Many that have been espoused to Christ before the world, but not from the heart, quite forsake their husband, and go back, for altogether, to their father's house by their apostasy. Like the mixed multitudes that came out of Egypt, but before they were gone far in the wilderness sounded a retreat back to the place from which they came. "The dog is thus turned to his vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire. These are they that draw back into perdition." The case of many, alas! is like that of the Levite's concubine; Judges 19. Concubines were indeed wives contracted to their husbands, though not with so great solemnity as proper wives; but they were bond servants, not free, not mistress of the family, nor could their children inherit. She played the harlot and went back to her father's house; and though means were used, yet she never came back to her husband's house, but perished in the way she had chosen. We now proceed,
II. To show whence it is that those who are espoused to Christ are so much unweaned from, and cannot forget their father's house and former lusts. There are some who have been joined to Christ only by the hand, who have given him the hand, but never gave him the heart. They are hypocrites, who have in profession only accepted of Christ in the marriage covenant. Others are joined to him with the heart who have really given themselves away to Christ without any dissimulation, as all true believers have done. Both these may fall under this charge, though they cannot go back an equal length to their former ways. Now for the reasons:
1. The consent of many to Christ is an involuntary consent. It was but a forced pretense, that ever they came into the covenant, no wonder then that they quickly look back. There are many things that may force a consent to the gospel covenant from a man; such as the power of the rod, an awakened conscience, and the like, may do it. Psalm 78:34, 36, 37. The stone thrown up in the air, will fall down of its own accord, when the force ceases. So will a rod forcibly bowed together extend itself again, when the hand that bowed it is removed; and a sow brought into a palace, will return to wallow in the mire, as soon as the restraint is removed. So will the heart return that is driven, but not drawn by love, into the covenant.
2. Because the heart has not been freely loosed from someone sin or another. Satan sometimes makes such an offer to his vassals, as Pharaoh did to Moses. "I will let you go," said he, "that you may sacrifice to the Lord your God in the wilderness; only you shall not go very far away." They accept. They go a great length with that young man, Mark 10:20, but still, as he, so they lack one thing, verse 21. There is someone lust or another, with which they can never freely part. Anything but that they will do, and when they seem to be putting their lusts in Christ's hands to destroy them, the secret voice of their hearts concerning that one is, what David charged Joab concerning Absalom, "Deal gently with the young man." And this serves Satan as a handle, by which he draws them back.
3. Because sin has never been made bitter enough to them, they have never been thoroughly weaned from their father's house. Hence, they are as the drunkard, who says, "they have stricken me, and I was not sick; they have beaten me, and I felt it not: when shall I awake? I will seek it yet again." Men will never forget, nor cease to suck the breasts of their lusts, until God lay gall and wormwood on them in such measure as to make the enjoyment of them more bitter than the want of them. What lightly comes, lightly goes. They who never had the fallow ground of their hearts ploughed up, and ploughed deep enough, must needs sow among thorns. Jeremiah 4:3, 4. The child that never found bitterness on the breasts, is easily set on again; and the soul that never tasted the bitterness of sin, will break over purposes, vows and resolutions, to get to it again.
4. Because by reason of their not living by faith on Christ, they find not that soul satisfaction in him which they expected. No wonder she long to be back at her father's house, who is disappointed of comfort in her husband's. The heart of man is an empty, hungry thing, that must always have something to feed upon; and if it feed not on Christ, it will go back to feed on lusts. The mixed multitude that came out of Egypt, not being brought, as they expected, to Canaan directly, they soon began to long after the enjoyment of Egypt.
5. Because there is a principle of corruption in the best, which still inclines the wrong way. "But I see," says Paul, "another law in my members warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members." Hence the best have deceitful hearts; "yes, deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked." They are as deceitful bows, ever ready to carry beside the mark. They are difficult to be known, and unworthy to be trusted. The root of all sin, the spawn of all iniquity is in them.
We are naturally simple souls. However resolute and peremptory we may be in things carnal, we are all of an easy temper, easily led aside to our own spiritual loss: easily beguiled in things that concern our souls' welfare. Esau, though a cunning hunter, was easily betrayed in the matter of the birthright.
We are also unstable souls. Unstable as water. A good frame is hard to get, and easily lost. It is like letters written in the sand, that a blast of wind does obliterate. Hence the soul often turns aside very quickly, and on very slender occasions, as Peter at the voice of a maid, and that even soon after some remarkable manifestations from the Lord. Thus it is said, that even "the disciples considered not the miracles of the loaves, for their heart was hardened."
Lastly, Because those of our father's house are still exerting themselves to make those espoused to Christ to keep up their former correspondence with them. While we are in the world, we will not want temptations. Satan is very diligent to improve all opportunities to make Christ's spouse deal falsely in her covenant. "Be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour." He is a subtle enemy, and has his devices, by which to entrap unwary souls. So we may blame our unwatchfulness for this.
USE 1. This may serve for our conviction and humiliation. We may lament and be ashamed of this bias of our hearts, so ready to look back to our former lusts, and after vows to make inquiry. Alas! are we not already found guilty in this point. How quickly is our zeal gone against our father's house, etc.
USE 2. Beware of looking back, and of hankering desires after your father's house and former lusts. For motives, consider,
1. The evil of this, the retaining any kindness to your former lusts in your ignorance, will be very grievous to the Spirit of Christ, whom you call your Lord and Husband. And no wonder, will you love them that hate the Lord, will you retain kindness to the enemies of your Lord; will you embrace those that were the cause of his death, and long to return to these, to deliver you from which Christ has done and suffered so much.
2. It will mar your communion with Christ. If you grieve his Spirit, he will depart. If you do not leave off your adulterous glauces to your idols, it will procure you his frowns instead of his smiles. If we regard iniquity in our hearts, the Lord will not hear us. So much of our hearts as our lusts get, so much Christ loses of them; and so much as we enjoy of them, so much we lose of the enjoyment of the Lord. Our loss, therefore, will be far greater than our gain.
3. It will keep you still unfixed and unstable in religion, so as you shall not make progress in it. They will never look to purpose to the house of their husband, nor duly take his interest to heart, that do not forget their father's house. A divided heart will never be hearty for the Lord.
4. It is very dishonorable to Christ. Is not this blessed match with the Son of God sufficient to compensate the loss of what you had in your father's house. Can anything be more dishonorable, than that the soul should still be hankering to be away, as if they repented the bargain with the Lord of glory.
Lastly, It is the fountain of apostasy. They that are often looking away, will be fair to break away at length. The way of sin is down the hill, from less to greater. This is the blowing of the coal, which in time may proceed to a consuming flame.
DOCTRINE 2. Those that are espoused to Christ, must forget their own people and their father's house. There are two points here: namely, first, the forgetting of our own people; and secondly, the forgetting of our father's house. I will speak to these in order. And in speaking, first, of forgetting our own people, I shall,
I. Show who are our own people, whom we must forget.
II. In what respects we must forget them.
III. Why we must forget them. I am then,
I. To show who are our own people, whom we must forget. In a word, it is the wicked world, "the children of disobedience, among whom, in time past, we had our conversation." When the soul comes to Christ, it must say as Ruth to Naomi, "your people shall be my people, and your God my God." When Christ calls a soul to himself, he calls it out of the world. The church is a congregation gathered out of, and separated from the world; though not in place, yet in respect of affection, which is the greatest separation. But to be more particular, a saint may know who are his own people, by taking a look of himself, as corrupt and carnal.
1. Then they are our own people, who are yet living in darkness, unacquainted with the corruption of their nature, and misery of it; strangers to the spirituality of the law of God; strangers to the majesty and holiness of God, their absolute need of Christ, and his preciousness and excellency. The saints may remember the day in which they lived in that same region of darkness, and knew not more of these things than they, and may hence conclude these are their own people. "Be not you therefore partakers with them. For you were sometimes darkness, but now are you light in the Lord: walk as children of the light."
2. They who are living in the same way and manner that the spouse of Christ did before her espousals; they are their own people walking on in the way which they have left; Ephesians 2:2, 3. Are they following the course of the world? do they venture frankly over the hedge of God's laws? You may know, then, by your former conversation, that they are your own people, from among whom Christ plucked you, as brands out of the burning.
3. They who are going the same way your carnal hearts would go, if they were left to their own corrupt choice. These are your own people; for as in water face answers to face, so do your hearts, as corrupt, answer to theirs. It is grace only that makes the difference, for the same nature is in both, only the power of that corrupt nature is broken in those that are espoused to Christ, but it is entire in others. There is another principle beside it in the godly, but it is alone, and sways all, in others.
4. They who are living in the same barren region, in which the saints lived, before their espousals to Christ. The state of nature is that barren region; that is a far country, far from God and his covenant, and therefore there is no communication between God and them, no influences for making them fruitful in the works of holiness; but a fullness of these our grapes of wickedness. These are our own people: "For we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy; hateful, and hating one another." We now proceed,
II. To show in what respects we must forget them.
1. We must forsake their company; it is evil company, unfitting Christ's spouse. "Forsake the foolish and live, and go in the way of understanding." While we are in the world, indeed, there is no shunning of evil men altogether; but you must not make wicked men your familiar friends, you must not choose their company; and if necessity lead you into their company, you must take heed to yourselves in it, and haste out of it as a plague house. They that are espoused to Christ, and yet keep wicked company as before, give no great evidence of their sincerity. Birds of a feather flock together, and you may know what a man is, by the company which he loves best.
2. We must not conform ourselves to them, nor be like them in their way. The command is, "be not conformed unto this world.' If we pretend a difference in our state from theirs, let there be a visible difference between our way and theirs. Do Satan's drudges bear the devil's mark, let us hate to take it on, or learn of them their ways. All that have a mind for Heaven, must be nonformists to the world, because the way of the world is against God and his law.
3. We must forget them in affection, saying, Depart from me, you bloody men. Though we are to wish well to the persons of all men, we must hate their evil ways, saying with David, "I hate the work of them that turn aside, it shall not cleave unto me." We must no more esteem their way as we were accustomed, nor desire to return into it. Have we been coming out of Sodom, we must not look back with a rueful look, otherwise we are not fit for the kingdom of God.
III. Why we must forget them.
1. Because they are not going our way. All men are on a journey to Heaven, or to Hell. There is a strait and narrow way that leads to Heaven, a broad way to Hell. If we are espoused to Christ, then we are on the narrow way; and how can we but forsake them that are going the quite opposite way. Nothing is more opposite than the way of holiness, and the way of the world; therefore we must either give up pretenses to Christ, or give up with the way of the world, "wherein in time past we walked according to the course of this world."
2. Because the godly and the wicked world are on two different sides, under two opposite heads, Christ and the devil. All the world is divided between these two, the Savior of the world, and the God of the world. Christ's party are his spouse, brethren, members of his body. The devil's are his captives, prisoners, slaves. And though these of Satan's party may come over, yet the truly godly will never mix with them in their ways. "You shall keep them, O Lord, you shall preserve them from this generation forever."
3. Because, in consenting to Christ, we give up with them. If you take me, let these go their way. Their company is infectious. "Evil communications corrupt good manners." Their way is destructive, therefore let not your hearts go after them and their ways. When you engaged with Christ, you engaged against both, and said, "your people shall be my people, and where you go I will go."
4. Because the world's friendship is enmity with God. James 4:4. What is wicked company but a combination against God, to trample on his laws, dishonor his Son, and grieve his Spirit. What are the ways of the world, but a direct opposition to God. So far, then, as we go with them, so far we go away from God. So much as they and their ways get of our affections, so much we lose of affection to Christ.
Lastly, Because there will be a total separation at last of the godly and wicked, Matthew 25. Grace begins it here. Grace gives a new nature, new principles, new designs, and new motives, all which make a new conversation, opposite to the way of the world. Therefore if we would not lodge with them in eternity, we must give up with them in time.
USE. Be exhorted then to forsake evil company, to stand at a distance from it, and conform not yourselves to the way of the world.
MOTIVE 1. Consider how unaccountable it is, that Christ's sheep should be found among the devil's goats; and Christ's servants joining issue with the devil's slaves? 2 Corinthians 6:14–16. If you have given up your name to Christ, why are you found on the devil's ground. Let the swine of the world feed together on the husks of sin, lie down together on the dunghill of their filthy lusts; but what has any to do among them that pretends to be a child of God.
2. The closer you are linked with them, the farther are you from God. Mix with the world and their way, and God will not know you as his. He commands a separation from these, if you would have a reception from him. "Wherefore," says he, "come out from among them, and be you separate, says the Lord; and touch not the unclean thing, and I will receive you." Men must go to the one side or the other; there is no keeping up with both God and ungodly company. Will men be swearing a covenant with God one day, and swearing with profane swearers another; drinking at the Lord's table, and at the table of drunkards, 1 Corinthians 10:21. God will never own such vagrants for members of his household. See their doom, Jude 13.
3. It hardens the wicked in their way. It is Solomon's observation, "they that forsake the law, praise the wicked; but such as keep the law contend with them." The sins of professors, going the way of evil men, is a practical testimony to the way of sin, emboldening the wicked to go on in their way. Whereas a testimony is to be kept up for God in the world, by a walk contrary to the way of the world. Thus Noah contended against the security and wickedness of the world, by a holy life, "by which he condemned the world, and became heir of the righteousness which is by faith."
4. Evil company is an affecting plague. "Evil communications corrupt good manners." How many fair blossoms of religion have been killed in the bud, by the poisonous breath of evil company? How many have been dragged over the belly of good principles, vows, and resolutions, by the violence of it. There is a mighty efficacy in it to advance the devil's kingdom, and men being once drawn in, it is a thousand to one if they go not far beyond these bounds which they had prescribed to themselves. For the devil's agents have that off their master, let them once get in a finger, and they will endeavor to get the whole hand to follow.
Lastly, If you do not be separated, you will share with them. Weighty is that word, "a companion of fools shall be destroyed." How many have cursed the day that ever they saw the face of those by whom they have been first led into sin, and next to ruin. It will be no comfort to suffer God's wrath with company, whatever may be in sinning together. If we go in the way with the wicked, we must go to the same place with them. And though mercy should rescue you, it will be so as by fire, as we see in Lot's case.
Let all take this warning, and observe it in their occasional encounters, that they be on their guard, and likewise in their fixed communications, in all changes of our lot, choose good company; and when you see that you are inevitably connected with naughty companions, mark them, that you may avoid them as much as possible.
II. I proceed now to speak of the forgetting of our father's house. This father is our father the devil, who keeps house in a wicked world, and in every unregenerate heart. But we must give up with it, if ever we would see the house of our father in Heaven. Here we shall,
I. Show with what of our father's house we must give up.
1. You must part with the master of the house, Satan, and renounce your relation to the house. Though you have no express compact with him, you have need to do this. There is a twofold relation all natural men have to the house. They are servants of the house, hence it is said, you were the servants of sin; their work is sin, and their wages is death. It is sad work, miserable wages; for he is the worst of masters, and they are the meanest sort of servants. Sinners have no term when they may leave their master, for they are slaves to Satan, and wholly in their master's power, taken captive by him at his will. He has a threefold title to them as his slaves. They are his slaves taken in war, "for of whom a man is overcome, of the same he is brought in bondage." The devil having proclaimed war against Heaven, attacked man as heaven's ally and confederate, and gained the victory over him. He is pursuing this war still against mankind, and driving the unrenewed world before him as prisoners of war, and so at his will. Isaiah 49:24, 25. They are also his bought slaves. Men, in general, like the Israelites, "have sold themselves to do evil in the sight of the Lord, to provoke him to anger." Where there is such a sale, Satan must needs be the buyer. It is a very low price, indeed, even for nothing. The foolish sinner thinks not so, while he makes the bargain; but when the latter end comes, he will see it is all naught he has gained, in comparison of the soul that is lost. Rome drives this trade. Revelation 18:13. Where have they learned it, but from the devil, who early set it up, buying our first parents for a parcel of forbidden fruit, and had the impudence to order the second Adam to fall down and worship him. He is daily buying a drunkard for some strong drink, a covetous worldling for a little pelf, a hypocrite for a name, unjust persons and liars for a very little thing. They are also his born slaves, born in his house, Ephesians 2:3. Many are born of parents, slaves to the devil, themselves, all their days; even those who themselves are free, yet their children are not therefore free too, for "they were shaped in iniquity, and in sin did their mothers conceive them." It is not the first birth, but the second, that will make us free men. Now we must give up that relation to the house. We must renounce our service, and break away from our old master, and betake ourselves to Christ, as a new master, who makes all his servants free men.
They are sons of the house. "You are of your father, the devil," said our Lord to the Jews. A sad sonship, for it is an ill house; it is to be a son of Hell, a prison house, a dark house, a dreadful house. Never was a child liker a father, than unregenerate persons are like the devil. His nature is enmity against God and his law, so is theirs. He is fallen, and so are they; lying in wickedness, and so are they.
Now we must give up that relation to the house. We must be born again, we must be new creatures, or we will be ashamed of our pretended espousals to Christ. For if any man be in Christ he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold all things are become new." The image of Satan must be defaced, the image of God restored in sanctification, and that work advanced in daily mortification to sin, and living to righteousness.
2. You must quit the work of the house. We must cast off the works of darkness. There is never an idle person about our father's house. Satan keeps all his children and servants busy at their task, that so they may not think of ways to escape, or of leaving him, as Pharaoh did with the Israelites. And what are they always about that keeps them busy. They are always at one of two things, they are either weaving the spider's web, or hatching the cockatrice egg. "They are weaving the spider's web." They are very busy doing nothing. Nothing for God, their souls, or eternity. Their webs will not become garments, neither shall they cover themselves with their works. All that they are busy about, will do no more to help their souls in the day of wrath, than a cobweb will clothe a man to defend him against the cold. The broom of death will sweep them and it away together; and about this heads and hands are employed. Or "they are hatching the cackatrice' eggs. He who eats of their eggs dies; and that which is crushed breaks out into a viper. They weary themselves to commit iniquity. They draw iniquity with cords of vanity, and treasure up wrath against the day of wrath." This is work. It is hard, toilsome, and dark work, soul-ruining work. Yet it is the work of the house, in which each strives to outdo another, and undo themselves. But as in other houses some are employed in coarser work, and others in finer, so it is in this house. The master of the house puts his coarser work in the hands of the profane, ignorant, earth worm, that has not so much as a form of godliness; and their task is "to fulfill the lusts of the flesh." He employs their tongues in swearing and lying, their bellies in gluttony and drunkenness, their bodies in impurity, their hands in picking and stealing; and their heads, hearts, hands continually about the world; so that on their belly they must go, and can never get up their head above the world, and their eye must never be satisfied with seeing, nor their ear with hearing, but like the grave, cry give, give; and loading themselves with thick clay, which they will never let go, until death separate them.
He puts his finer work in the hands of the hypocritical professors, who work such a coat to themselves, as they shine in it like angels of light, and their task is, "to fulfill the desires of the mind." He employs them to deceive the world with their hypocritical pretenses to piety, and to deceive themselves also. Their business is to oppose themselves to the very heart and life of the gospel, by their unbelief, self-righteousness, pride, and self-conceit; and to keep in the life of some lusts by their form of religion, and shelter them under a cover of religious duties; to do much mischief to the church of God, and stumble and bring to ruin many poor souls.
Now you must quit the work of the house, of whatever sort it be. You must not be like those that will give over their master, engage with another, and yet come back, and fall to their work again. You must take other work in hand: I do not say more work, for as the watch that goes wrong, goes as fast as that which goes right, you will have as much work in your father's house as in your husband's.
3. You must part with the provision and entertainment of the house. People use to get their meat where they work their work, and Satan's slaves get their meat also in their father's house. And what is their entertainment? He sets them down "to eat dust with the serpent," Isaiah 65:25. He feeds them on filthy lusts, which may nourish their corruptions, but is poisonous to their souls. Satan did once eat angel's food in the enjoyment of God, but now dust is his meat with the serpent, that is, as it was the meat and drink of Christ to do the will of his Father, so it is Satan's to sin against God and to do mischief, all the pleasure he has lies there. So it is with Christless sinners, the sweetest milk which they suck is out of the breasts of their lusts; the enjoyment of God was never so sweet to those whose God is their belly, as meat and drink; the dishonest person has not so much pleasure in the gospel treasure, as in some thing that he can catch to please the covetous heart.
He sets them also "to eat husks with the swine," Luke 15:16. He feeds them with the empty dry things of the world, and they are dressed up according as every one likes best. Some get the pleasures, others the profits, others the honors of it set before them, and on these they feed. So the voluptuous man has more delight in carnal pleasures than in communion with God; "for they are lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God." The worldling has more pleasure in his goods and chattels, than in all the spiritual gains of true godliness. These things are to him but shadows, but what he can hold is substance. "I am become rich," says he, "I have found me out substance." The ambitious man has more delight in a name and honor among men, than in the honor of God's approbation. "How can you believe, which receive honor one of another, and seek not the honor that comes from God only."
Now you must quit the entertainment of the house, and betake yourself to the entertainment and provision of the house of Heaven. "Wherefore do you spend money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which satisfies not? hearken diligently unto me, and eat you that which is good, and let your soul delight itself in fatness." You ask bread in your father's house, and he gives you a stone, for what he gives is not bread, and satisfies not the soul. The dust of lusts is not good, change your dust then, and "eat that which is good." God, grace, communion with God, and all the benefits of the covenant are good. They are good for the soul and the body, for time and eternity. The husks of the world have no fatness in them, change them therefore, and "let your souls delight themselves in fatness." Spiritual things are full of sap, and will make your souls prosper.
4. You must quit the fashions of the house. Every house has its own fashions, and so has your father's; but that must not keep them up. "Be not conformed unto this world." They are evil fashions, you are not to bring them along with you to your husband's house. The fashion of the house, in natural actions, is to follow these actions in a mere selfish way, to gratify a carnal appetite, without any eye to God in them, or fitting us thereby for his service. You must quit it, and must not be like your father's house in them. Modesty and sobriety, and referring all to the honor of God, is the fashion you must fall in with, as the fashion of your husband's house. "Whether, therefore, you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." The fashion of your father's house, in civil actions, is to be sunk and swallowed up in these things, to be minding them more "than the one thing needful," and to have no respect to the command nor honor of God in them; and so to make these things either jostle out duty to God altogether, or to take such a lift of them, that no vigor of spirit, and sometimes even no strength of body, is left for duty to God. To be untender in these things, and even to give conscience a stretch, if a person can gain any profit or ease by it. To count truth in words, and exact uprightness in dealing, and to do no other way to others, than we would they should do to us, but needless nicety. If you quit not these fashions, you will never see the house of Heaven. Luke 10:41, 42; 1 Corinthians 6:8, 9; 1 Thessalonians 4:6. If ever men get more religion, they will get more moral honesty.
The fashion of your father's house in religious actions, (for there is some religion even in that house, but it is of the fashion of the house), that is to hold with the one half, and that too the worst half, the outer half, the mere form of godliness. To hold with bodily exercise, but endeavor not to worship God in spirit. So that men in that house shut the eyes of their bodies, yet their hearts are going after their covetousness; they bow their knees, but their hearts remain inflexible. It is their custom to seek to please themselves more than God, Matthew 6:2. To go about these duties that they may sin the more freely, and so make a covering of them to some lust, Proverbs 7:14, 15. They put them in Christ's room, "going about to establish a righteousness of their own." If you quit not these fashions, you are not God's people, "for God is a spirit, and they that worship him, must worship him in spirit and in truth." "His people are the circumcision, who worship him in spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh." Hypocrisy is a mask which God will pluck off.
5. You must quit the garb of the house. Under the Old Testament, when people were to make any solemn appearance before God, they were called to change their garments, Genesis 34:2. And if you would show yourselves Christ's spouse, you must part with the garb of the house, off which you are come. You must part with the inner garment of the house, "that is the old man with his deeds." Ephesians 4:22; Colossians 3:9. The old man is the corrupt evil nature; his deeds are the corrupt workings of that nature in heart and life. These cleave close to us, as a belt to the loins of a man, but we must be putting them off by daily mortification. In vain do we pretend to be espoused to Christ, if we still retain our former lusts. Christ has another garment for his spouse, which we must put on, if ever we see Heaven, that is "the new man," the new nature with a new life, Ephesians 4:24. It is made up of two pieces: righteousness, the whole of our duty to man; and holiness, the whole of our duty to God. For true religion is universal, and therefore it is called a man; not a member or two of a man, but a whole man.
You must also part with the upper garment of the house, that is the filthy rags of your own righteousness, Isaiah 64:6; Zechariah 3:4. The way in our father's house, is to cover their unrighteousness with their own righteousness, their evil with their good, their sins with their duties. But alas! all this is but a covering of rags, that will not hide your shame before the Lord; a covering of filthy rags, that will make you more vile. Christ has provided the white clothing of his own righteousness for you, that must be put on by faith; and all you do must be washed in the blood of the lamb, or you will be ruined with it. You must learn that lesson in your husband's house, that never one could yet learn in their father's house, even to work in religion, as if you were to win Heaven by working, and then to overlook all, as if you had done nothing.
Lastly, You must quit the interest of the house. People readily are concerned for the interest of the house of which they are members, and none more than the members of our father's, that do their utmost to support it. Now, if you mind for Heaven, you must quit this interest, and pursue the interest of the house of Heaven. You must not interest yourselves in the quarrels of that house. That house has a quarrel against the image of God, the power of godliness, and the people of God, Genesis 3:15; and all the members of the house interest themselves in the quarrel, one way or another, to bear down the exercise of godliness. Persecutors strike it down; mockers jest upon, and laugh at it; the worldly man gravely pronounces it to be folly; the hypocrite's heart rises bitterly against it, and bears it down and smothers it, with contention and strife about outward things. All join together in the quarrel, though they go different ways to work. But you must stand upon the side of godliness.
You must not support the interest of your father's house. Christ was sent to pull it down, "to destroy the works of the devil;" do not you put to your hand to hold it up. The members of the house are very much concerned to hold it up. They will not give their help to curb sin, but, upon the contrary, they encourage one another by example and otherwise, like Babel-builders, to go on with the work. Let none that mind for Heaven, support the interest of Satan in the family, or in any place where they are. We now proceed,
II. To give reasons, why these that are espoused to Christ, must forget their father's house.
1. Because our father's house, and husband's house, are quite contrary the one to the other, as Heaven and Hell, light and darkness, and there is no reconciling them, 2 Corinthians 6:14, 15. Therefore we must renounce our part in, and relation to the one, if we mind to plead a part in, and relation to the other. They never shall mix. "God will preserve his people from this generation, forever." They never can mix. "You cannot serve God and mammon." The heads of these houses are opposite, the work, the entertainment, the fashions, and interests; therefore, as you would not renounce your part in Christ, forget your father's house.
2. Because, as our husband's house is most honorable, so our father's house is most base. These that are espoused to Christ, as Christ is their husband, they are God's children; they are of the same family with the angels; nay, the very angels are ministering spirits, to take care of them who are joint heirs with Christ. They are honorable in their relations, and rich in their title to Heaven and glory. But our father's house has nothing in it but baseness, for it is a fallen house, fallen from honor to the deepest disgrace, from happiness to extreme poverty and misery. For us to follow the ways of it, is as if one brought into a noble family could not forget, but bring along with her, the way of the beggarly family from which she came.
3. Because we will never apply ourselves to the way of our husband's house, if we forget not our father's house. While the hearts of the Israelites were set on the flesh pots of Egypt, they could make no progress in their journey to Canaan. Laban knew that Jacob could not enjoy his service, when he much longed after his father's house. The affectionate remembrance of the work and provision of our father's house will be a dead weight on those that have begun to run the race set before them; and always, the more we give way to our corruptions, the more tenderly we handle our lusts, religion will be the more difficult.
4. Because it is the worst of houses. No wonder, for the devil, the worst of masters, is the master of the house. No slavery like the service of that house. It is soul slavery. No entertainment like it, for it can never satisfy; nay, it is destructive to the soul. The work thereof is sin, the wages death, eternal death. The fashions of the house are the very reverse of all that is good. The interests of the house are the dishonor of God, the ruin of mankind. The garb of the house is filthy rags, and the shame of their nakedness will at length appear before the world.
USE 1. Of Information. It informs us,
1. In vain do we pretend to be espoused to Christ, if we do not reform our lives according to the rules of the gospel, but still hold on the old way, 2 Corinthians 5:17. The old life, with a new profession and an engagement to be the Lord's, will make men but whited sepulchers; or like an old rotten wall new plastered, that will burst out fearfully, and go to ruin.
It is not enongh to be like neighbor and other. It is but a sorry character. All the people of God must be nonconformists to, and dissenters from the world. The broad gate is room enough for multitudes, but they that will be at Heaven, must be a singular sort of people, for they are men wondered at; content to take on them the hatred of their native country, and father's house.
USE. 2. It reproves those that will not forget their father's house, but cleave to it and to the way thereof. And who are these?
1. Those that, in the midst of gospel light, yet continue in the darkness of the house; even all grossly ignorant persons. They that are brought out of their father's house to Christ, are brought out of darkness to light, though they know not a letter. "They were sometimes darkness, but now are they light in the Lord." If people remain ignorant under gospel means, we know what is the cause, their father has put out their eyes. 2 Corinthians 4:8, 4. This will end in eternal darkness. "It is a people of no understanding, therefore he who made them will not have mercy on them; and he who formed them, will show them no favor."
2. Those that retain the language of the house. When Peter spoke, the damsel knew what countryman he was. "You are a Galilean, for your speech betrays you." And what shall we say of you, that are a curser, a swearer, a liar, a filthy speaker, but you are a Hellilean. I appeal to your own consciences, what sort of language that is, whether it sounds like Heaven or Hell. To hear a man speak as if Hell were opening; breathing out lies, as if inspired by the father of them; speaking, as if an unclean devil were speaking out of him; what can one think in such a case, but that the person speaks like the house to which he belongs. But if you will not forbear that language, it will turn to blaspheming at length through a long eternity. For the former is the language of the house in time, the other in eternity.
3. Those that wear the badge of the house on their breasts, the master of the house's mark on their foreheads, so that those who go by may easily know who they are. Profane people. You that will not bow a knee to God. "The wicked, through the pride of his countenance, will not seek after God." You that take room to yourselves in all licentiousness, that have nothing to do with religion, but to show aversion to all that is good; if not to mock and reproach others that seem to be religious. Will you pretend to any portion in Christ? No, no, you know not Christ, and he will dishown you. A dumb devil possesses you now, that you cannot, will not pray to God now; the day will come, that you will cry to the hills to fall upon you, and hide you from the face of the judge. You will have a merry life of it now, but you shall weep; you will make a jest of religion now, but that will make you roar at length. Your heart is averse to all that is good now, the copestone will be put on it in Hell. You care not for prayers, godly discourse, examinations, or sermons; but some of you will go to the hill with the beasts, Sabbath after Sabbath, and desire no person to take that task off your hand. Well were it for you, if, as you live with the beasts, you were to die with them also.
4. Those that give up themselves to the trade of the house, minding nothing but the world, earthly things. They have no trade with Heaven. They know not what communion with God means. They will have their work on earth as far advanced as their neighbors, but their work for eternity is yet to begin. They are so busy they cannot get time for it. They have so much to do otherwise, they cannot get anything done to purpose for their perishing souls. That is folly, for the world will be consumed in flames, when that soul of yours shall continue to exist, to be either eternally happy or miserable, as it is now seen to be in time.
Lastly, Those that are the hidden servants of the house. It has been said of some, that they have stealed away to Heaven, without being observed; but there are others that steal away to Hell, and the world never hears the sound of their feet: even deep veiled hypocrites, whited sepulchers. "They are disobedient, deceiving, serving divers lusts and pleasures." They wear Christ's livery, but yet are Satan's drudges. There are always some lusts that have such persons absolutely under their power. The broad way is wide enough, so that they can easily get a bye path in it, to go by themselves to destruction, without mixing with the profane rabble that keep the highway. However, all come to one lodging at length. "As for such as turn aside to their crooked ways, the Lord shall lead them forth with the workers of iniquity."
USE OF EXHORTATION. Be exhorted to forget your father's house. Leave the master of the house, the work, and the provision of the house. Renounce the devil, the world, and the flesh, and betake yourselves to Christ and his service.
MOTIVE 1. Your father's house will remove, and it will be a sad removing. Our Lord's family will remove also, but it will be a happy removing. Christ has a higher house in Heaven, to which he will remove all the family he has on earth. The devil has a higher and a lower house also. His higher house is in this world, and it is a throng house; but the day is coming that his family will remove into the lower house, the bottomless pit, so as not one shall remain behind. There are some removing out of it daily, and then the rest that remained behind are secure, but it will not be always so. There was a horrible cry at Dathan and Abiram's removing, Numbers 16:31–34; what a cry will there be when the family goes away together, and "shall all be cast into the lake of fire," which is their new house! Leave it then quickly, lest you perish with it.
MOTIVE 2. It is highly reasonable, if you will have any part in Christ. You can have no part in him, but as espoused to him; and if espoused, then "you must leave your father and mother, and cleave to your husband." Did he not say to you in the offer made, If you take me, let these go their way. "Will you come into this house, and not forget your father's house? Nay, if you do not, he will pursue you as he did Israel, like those who break wedlock. You have all professed your acceptance of the marriage covenant, all have had the seal of it in baptism, and some of you in the ordinance of the supper. Remember, then, you have lifted up your hands to the Lord, and cannot go back.
Lastly, Consider the motive in the following verse, "So shall the king greatly desire your beauty." From this you have several arguments, your leaving off these will truly beautify you in the sight of the Lord. Holiness is a beauty, it is soul beauty, a lasting beauty. Now, thus beautified, you shall be amiable and acceptable in the sight of your Lord and Husband, and he will take pleasure in you. He is a King worthy to be pleased, and his favor worthy to be sought. Finally, you shall be at no loss, whatever you part with for his sake. Communion and fellowship with him will make up all your losses. Amen.