A Discourse on
Meekness and Quietness of Spirit
Matthew Henry
"A meek and quiet spirit, which is in the
sight of God of great price." 1 Peter 3:4
THE NATURE OF MEEKNESS AND QUIETNESS OF SPIRIT
Meekness and quietness seem to imply much the same thing,
but as the latter has something of metaphor in it, it will illustrate the
former, so we shall speak of them distinctly.
We must be of a MEEK spirit. Meekness is easiness of
spirit: not a sinful easiness to be debauched, as Ephraim's, who willingly
walked after the commandment of the idolatrous princes; nor a simple
easiness to be imposed upon and deceived, as Rehoboam's, who, when he was
forty years old, is said to be young and tender-hearted; but a gracious
easiness to be wrought upon by that which is good, as theirs whose heart of
stone is taken away and to whom a heart of flesh is given. Meekness
accommodates the soul to every occurrence, and so makes a man easy to
himself and to all about him. The Latins call a meek man mansuetus,
which refers to the taming and reclaiming of creatures wild by nature,
and bringing them to be tractable and familiar. James 3:7, 8. Man's corrupt
nature has made him like the wild donkey used to the wilderness, or the
swift dromedary traversing her ways. Jer. 2:23, 24. But when the grace of
meekness gets dominion in the soul, it alters the temper of it, submits it
to management; and now the wolf dwells with the lamb, and the leopard lies
down with the kid, and a little child may lead them; for enmities are laid
aside, and there is nothing to hurt or destroy. Isa. 11:6, 9.
Meekness may be considered with respect both to God
and to our brethren; it belongs to both the tables of the law,
and attends upon the first great commandment, You shall love the Lord your
God; as well as the second, which is like it, You shall love your neighbor
as yourself; though its special reference is to the latter.
I. There is MEEKNESS TOWARDS God, and it is the easy and
quiet submission of the soul to His whole will, according as He is pleased
to make it known, whether by His word or by His providence.
1. It is the silent submission of the soul to the word
of God: the understanding bowed to every divine truth, and the will to
every divine precept; and both without murmuring or arguing. The word is
then an "engrafted word," when it is received with meekness, that is, with a
sincere willingness to be taught, and desire to learn. Meekness is a grace
that cuts the stock, and holds it open, that the word, as a shoot, may be
grafted in; it breaks up the fallow ground, and makes it fit to receive the
seed; captivates the high thoughts, and lays the soul like white paper under
God's pen. When the dayspring takes hold of the ends of the earth, it is
said to be turned as clay to the seal. Job 38:14. In the same way, meekness
disposes the soul to admit the rays of divine light, which before it
rebelled against; it opens the heart, as Lydia's was opened, and sets us
down with Mary at the feet of Christ, the learner's place and posture.
The promise of teaching is made to the meek,
because they are disposed to learn: "the meek He will teach His way." The
word of God is gospel indeed, "good tidings to the meek;" they will
entertain it and welcome it. The "poor in spirit" are evangelized; and
Wisdom's alms are given to those that with meekness wait daily at her gates,
and like beggars wait at the doorposts. Prov. 8:34. The language of this
meekness is that of the child Samuel: "Speak, Lord, for Your servant hears;"
and that of Joshua, who, when he was in that high post of honor, giving
command to Israel, and bidding defiance to all their enemies—his breast
filled with great and bold thoughts—yet, upon the hint of a message from
heaven, thus submits himself to it: "What does my Lord say to His servant?"
and that of Paul—and it was the first breath of the new man—"Lord, what will
You have me to do?" and that of Cornelius: "And now we are all here present
before God, to hear all that you have been commanded by the Lord;" and that
of the good man I have read of, who, when he was going to hear the word,
used to say, "Now let the word of the Lord come; and if I had six hundred
necks, I would bow them all to the authority of it." To receive the word
with meekness, is to be delivered into it as into a mold: this seems to be
Paul's metaphor in Rom. 6:17, that "form of doctrine which was delivered
you." Meekness softens the wax, that it may receive the impression of the
seal, whether it be for doctrine or reproof, for correction or instruction
in righteousness. It opens the ear to discipline, silences objections, and
suppresses the risings of the carnal mind against the word; agreeing with
the law that it is good and esteeming all the precepts concerning all things
to be right, even when they give the greatest check to flesh and blood.
True meekness will prevent us from opposing either the
obvious parts of Scripture, severely as they may denounce our vices, or
the mysterious parts, in reading which vanity may suggest that we
could have dictated what is more profitable. Augustine.
2. It is the silent submission of the soul to the
providence of God, for that also is the will of God concerning us.
1. When the events of Providence are grievous and
afflicting, displeasing to sense and opposing our worldly interests,
meekness not only quiets us under them, but reconciles us to them; and
enables us not only to bear, but to receive evil as well as good at the hand
of the Lord; which is the excellent frame that Job argues himself into: it
is to kiss the rod, and even to accept the punishment of our sin, taking all
in good part that God does; not daring to contend with our Maker, no, nor
desiring to advise Him, but being dumb, and not opening the mouth, because
God does it. How meek was Aaron under the severe dispensation which took
away his sons with a particular mark of divine wrath. He "held his peace."
God was sanctified, and therefore Aaron was satisfied, and had not a word to
say against it. How unlike this was the temper, or rather the distemper
of David, who was not like a man after God's own heart when he was
displeased because the Lord had made a breach upon Uzzah—as if God must have
asked David permission to assert the honor of his ark. When God's anger is
kindled, our anger must be stifled; such is the law of meekness, that
whatever pleases God must not displease us. David was in a better frame when
he penned the 56th Psalm, the title of which, some think, speaks
of his calm and submissive spirit when the Philistines took him in Gath. It
is entitled, The Silent Dove Afar Off. It was his calamity that he was afar
off, but he was then as a silent dove—mourning perhaps, Isa.38:14—but not
murmuring, not struggling, not resisting, when seized by the birds of prey;
and the psalm he penned in this frame was Michtam, a golden psalm. The
language of this meekness is that of Eli, "It is the Lord;" and that of
David to the same purport, "Here am I; let Him do to me as seems good to
Him." Not only, He can do what He will, subscribing to His power, for
who can stay His hand? or, He may do what He will, subscribing to His
sovereignty, for He gives not account of any of His matters; or, He will
do what He will, subscribing to His unchangeableness, for He is of one mind,
and who can turn Him? but, Let him do what He will, subscribing to
His wisdom and goodness, as Hezekiah, "Good is the word of the Lord, which
you have spoken." Let Him do what He will, for He will do what is best; and
therefore if God should refer the matter to me, says the meek and quiet
soul, being well assured that He knows what is good for me better than I do
for myself, I would refer it to Him again: "He shall choose our inheritance
for us."
2. When the methods of Providence are dark and
intricate, and we are quite at a loss what God is about to do with
us—His way is in the sea, and His path in the great waters, and His
footsteps are not known, clouds and darkness are round about Him—a meek and
quiet spirit acquiesces in an assurance that all things shall work together
for good to us, if we love God, though we cannot understand how or which
way. It teaches us to follow God with an implicit faith, as Abraham did when
he went out, not knowing where he went, but knowing very well whom
he followed. It quiets us with this, that though what He does we know not
now, yet we shall know hereafter. John 13:7. When poor Job was brought to
that dismal plunge, that he could no way trace the footsteps of divine
Providence, but was almost lost in the labyrinth, Job 23:8, 9, how quietly
does he sit down with this thought: "But He knows the way that I take: when
He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold."
II. There is MEEKNESS TOWARDS OUR BRETHREN, towards "all
men." Tit. 3:2. Meekness is especially conversant about the disposition of
anger: not to entirely destroy and erase from the soul the holy indignation
of which the Scriptures speak, for that were to quench a coal which
sometimes there is occasion for, even at God's altar, and to blunt the edge
even of the spiritual weapons with which we are to carry on our spiritual
warfare; but its office is to direct and govern this affection, that we may
be angry and not sin. Eph. 4:26.
Meekness, in the school of the philosophers, is a virtue
consisting in a mean between the extremes of rash excessive anger on the one
hand, and a defect of anger on the other; a mean which Aristotle confesses
it very hard exactly to gain.
Meekness, in the school of Christ, is one of the fruits
of the Spirit. Gal. 5:22, 23. It is a grace wrought by the Holy Spirit both
as a sanctifier and as a comforter in the hearts of all true believers,
teaching and enabling them at all times to keep their passions under the
conduct and government of religion and right reason. I observe that it is
worked in the hearts of all true believers, because, though there are some
whose natural temper is unhappily sour and harsh, yet wherever there is true
grace, there is a disposition to strive against, and strength in some
measure to conquer such a disposition. And though in this, as in other
graces, an absolute sinless perfection cannot be expected in this present
state, yet we are to labor after it, and press towards it.
More particularly, the work and office of meekness is to
enable us to prudently govern our own anger when at any time we are
provoked, and to patiently bear the anger of others, that it may not provoke
us. The former is its office especially in superiors, the latter in
inferiors, and both in equals.
1. Meekness teaches us prudently to govern our own
anger whenever anything occurs that is provoking. As it is the work of
temperance to moderate our natural appetites in things that are pleasing to
sense, so it is the work of meekness to moderate our natural passions
against those things that are displeasing to sense, and to guide and govern
our resentments. Anger in the soul is like mettle in a horse, good if it is
well managed. Now meekness is the bridle, as wisdom is the hand that gives
law to it, puts it into the right way, and keeps it in an even, steady, and
regular pace; reducing it when it turns aside, preserving it in a due
decorum, and restraining it and giving it restraint when at any time it
grows headstrong and outrageous, and threatens mischief to ourselves or
others. It must thus be held in, like the horse and mule, with bit and
bridle, lest it break the hedge, run over those that stand in its way, or
throw the rider himself headlong. It is true of anger, as we say of fire,
that it is a good servant but a "bad master;" it is good on the hearth, but
bad in the hangings. Meekness keeps it in its place, sets banks to this sea,
and says, This far you shall come, and no further; here shall your proud
waves stop.
In reference to our own anger, when at any time we meet
with the excitements of it, the work of meekness is to do these four things:
1. To consider the circumstances of that which we
perceive to be a provocation, so as at no time to express our displeasure
except upon due mature deliberation. The office of meekness is to keep
reason upon the throne in the soul as it ought to be; to preserve the
understanding clear and unclouded, the judgment untainted and unbiased in
the midst of the greatest provocations, so as to be able to set every thing
in its true light, and to see it in its own color, and to determine
accordingly; as also to keep silence in the court, that the "still small
voice" in which the Lord is, as He was with Elijah at mount Horeb, may not
be drowned by the noise of the tumult of the passions.
A meek man will never be angry at a child, at a servant,
at a friend, until he has first seriously weighed the cause in just and even
balances, while a steady and impartial hand holds the scales, and a free and
unprejudiced thought judges it necessary. It is said of our Lord Jesus, John
11:33, He troubled Himself; which denotes it to be a considerate act, and
what He saw reason for. Things go right in the soul, when no resentments are
admitted into the affections but what have first undergone the scrutiny of
the understanding, and thence received their pass. That passion which does
not come in by this door, but climbs up some other way, the same is a thief
and a robber, against which we should guard. In a time of war—and such a
time it is in every sanctified soul, in a constant war between grace and
corruption—due care must be taken to examine all travelers, especially those
that come armed: where they came from, where they go, whom they are for, and
what they would have. Thus should it be in the well-governed,
well-disciplined soul. Let meekness stand sentinel; and upon the advance of
a provocation, let us examine who it is that we are about to be angry with,
and for what. What are the merits of the cause; where does the offense lie;
what was the nature and tendency of it? What are likely to be the
consequences of our resentments; and what harm will it be if we stifle them,
and let them go no further? Such as these are the questions which meekness
would put to the soul; and in answer to them it would remove all which
passion is apt to suggest, and hear reason only as it becomes rational
creatures to do.
Three great dictates of meekness we find put together in
one scripture: "Be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath;" which some
observe to be couched in three proper names of Ishmael's sons, Gen. 25:14; 1
Chr. 1:30—which Bishop Prideaux, in the beginning of the wars, recommended
to a gentleman that had been his pupil, as the summary of his advice—Mishma,
Dumah, Massa; the signification of which is, hear, keep silence, bear.
Hear reason, keep passion silent, and then you will not find it
difficult to bear the provocation.
It is said of the Holy One of Israel, when the Egyptians
provoked Him, He weighed a path to His anger; so the margin reads it from
the Hebrew, Psa. 78:50. Justice first poised the cause, and then anger
poured out the vials. Thus the Lord came down to see the pride of the
Babel-builders before He scattered them, and to see the wickedness of Sodom
before He overthrew it—though both were obvious and barefaced—to teach us to
consider before we are angry, and to judge before we pass sentence, that
herein we may be followers of God as dear children, and be merciful, as our
Father which is in heaven is merciful.
We read of the "meekness of wisdom;" for where there is
not wisdom—that wisdom which is profitable to direct, that wisdom of the
prudent which is to understand his way—meekness will not long be preserved.
It is our rashness and inconsideration that betray us to all the mischiefs
of an ungoverned passion, on the neck of which the reins are laid which
should be kept in the hand of reason, and so we are hurried upon a thousand
precipices. Nehemiah is a remarkable instance of prudence presiding in just
resentments: he owns, "I was very angry when I heard their cry;" but that
anger did not at all transgress the laws of meekness, for it follows, "then
I consulted with myself," or as the Hebrew has it, my heart consulted in me.
Before he expressed his displeasure he retired into his own bosom, took time
for sober thought upon the case, and then he rebuked the nobles in a very
solid, rational discourse, and the success was good. In every cause when
passion demands immediate judgment, meekness moves for further time, and
will have the matter fairly argued, and counsel heard on both sides.
When Job had any quarrel with his servants, he was
willing to admit a rational debate of the matter, and to hear what they had
to say for themselves; for he says, "What shall I do when God rises up?" And
withal, "Did not He that made me in the womb, make him?" When our hearts are
at any time hot within us, we should do well to put that question to
ourselves which God put to Cain, Gen. 4:6. Why am I angry? Why am I angry at
all? Why so soon angry? Why so very angry? Why so far transported and
dispossessed of myself by my anger? What reason is there for all this? Do I
well to be angry for a gourd, that came up in a night and perished in a
night? Jonah 4:9. Should I be touched to the quick by such a sudden and
transient provocation? Will not my cooler thoughts correct these hasty
resentments, and therefore were it not better to check them now? Such are
the reasonings of the meekness of wisdom.
2. The work of meekness is to calm the spirit, so
as that the inward peace may not be disturbed by any outward provocation. No
doubt a man may express his displeasure against the miscarriages of another,
as much as at any time there is occasion for, without suffering his
resentments to recoil upon himself, and throw his own soul into a fury. What
need is there for a man to tear himself—his soul, as it is in the Hebrew—in
his anger? Job 18:4. Cannot we charge home upon our enemy camp without the
willful disordering of our own troops? Surely we may, if meekness has the
command; for that is a grace which keeps a man master of himself while he
contends to be master of another, and fortifies the heart against the
assaults of provocation that do us no great harm while they do not rob us of
our peace, nor disturb the rest of our souls. As patience in case of sorrow,
so meekness in case of anger keeps possession of the soul, as the expression
is in Luke 21:19, that we be not dispossessed of that freehold. The drift of
Christ's farewell sermon to his disciples we have in the first words of it,
"Let not your hearts be troubled." John 14:1. It is the duty and interest of
all good people, whatever happens, to keep trouble from their hearts, and to
have them even and sedate, though the eye, as Job expresses it, should
"continue" unavoidably "in the provocation" of this world. "The wicked"—the
turbulent and unquiet, as the world primarily signifies—"are like the
troubled sea when it cannot rest;" but that peace of God which passes all
understanding, keeps the hearts and minds of all the meek of the earth.
Meekness preserves the mind from being ruffled and discomposed, and the
spirit from being unhinged by the vanities and vexations of this lower
world. It stills the noise of the sea, the noise of her waves, and the
tumult of the soul; it permits not the passions to crowd out in a disorderly
manner, like a confused, ungoverned rabble, but draws them out like the
trained bands, every one in his own order, as wisdom and grace give the word
of command.
3. Meekness will curb the tongue, and "keep the
mouth as with a bridle" when the heart is hot. Even when there may be
occasion for a keenness of expression, and we are called to rebuke
sharply—cuttingly, Titus 1:13—yet meekness forbids all fury and indecency of
language, and every thing that sounds like clamor and evil-speaking. The
meekness of Moses was not at hand when he spoke that unadvised word
"rebels," for which he was shut out of Canaan, though rebels they were, and
at that time very provoking. Men in a passion are apt to give reviling
language, to call names, and those most senseless and ridiculous—to take the
blessed name of God in vain, and so profane it. It is a wretched way by
which the children of hell vent their passion at their beasts, their
servants, any person, or any thing that provokes them, to swear at them. Men
in a passion are apt to reveal secrets, to make rash vows and resolutions,
which afterwards prove a snare, and sometimes to slander and belie their
brethren, and bring railing accusations, and so do the devil's work; and to
speak that "in their haste" concerning others, Psalm 116:11, of which they
afterwards see cause to repent. How brutishly did Saul in his passion call
his own son, the heir-apparent to the crown, the "son of the perverse
rebellious woman." "Racca" and "you fool" are specified by our Savior as
breaches of the law of the sixth commandment; and the passion in the heart
is so far from excusing such opprobrious speeches—for which purpose it is
commonly alleged—that really it is that which gives them their malignity:
they are the smoke from that fire, the gall and wormwood springing from that
root of bitterness; and if for "every idle word that men speak," much more
for such wicked words as these, must they give an account at the day of
judgment. And as it is a reflection upon God to kill, so it is to curse men
that are made after the image of God, though ever so much our inferiors;
that is, to speak ill of them, or to wish ill to them.
This is the disease which meekness prevents, and is in
the tongue a "law of kindness." It is to the tongue as the helm is to the
ship, Jas. 3:4, not to silence it, but to guide it, to steer it wisely,
especially when the wind is high. If at any time we have conceived passion
and thought evil, meekness will lay the hand upon the mouth—as the wise
man's advice is, Prov. 30:32—to keep that evil thought from venting itself
in any evil word reflecting upon God or our brother. It will reason a
disputed point without noise, give a reproof without a reproach, convince a
man of his folly without calling him a fool, will teach superiors either to
forbear threatening, Eph. 6:9, or, as the margin reads it, to moderate it;
and will look diligently lest any root of bitterness, springing up, trouble
us, and thereby we and many others become defiled.
4. Meekness will cool the heat of passion quickly,
and not allow it to continue. As it keeps us from being soon angry, so it
teaches us when we are angry to be soon pacified. The anger of a meek man is
like fire struck out of steel—hard to get out; and when it is, soon gone.
The wisdom that is from above, as it is "gentle," and so not apt to provoke,
so it is "easy to be entreated" when any provocation is given, and has the
ear always open to the first proposals and overtures of satisfaction,
submission, and reconciliation; and thus the anger is turned away. He that
is of a meek spirit will be quick to forgive injuries and affronts, and has
some excuse or other ready with which to extenuate and qualify the
provocation, which an angry man, for the exasperating and justifying of his
own resentments, will industriously aggravate. It is but to say, "There is
no great harm done; or if there is, there was none intended; and
peradventure it was an oversight;" and so the offense, being looked at
through that end of the perspective which diminishes, is easily passed by,
and the distemper being taken in time, goes off quickly, the fire is
quenched before it gets head, and by a speedy intervention the plague is
stopped. While the world is so full of the sparks of provocation, and there
is so much tinder in the hearts of the best, no marvel if anger come
sometimes into the bosom of a wise man; but it rests only in the
bosom of fools. Eccl. 7:9. Angry thoughts as other vain thoughts may crowd
into the heart upon a sudden surprise, but meekness will not suffer them to
lodge there, nor let the sun go down upon the wrath, Eph. 4:26; for if it
does, there is danger lest it rise bloody the next morning. Anger concocted
becomes malice; it is the wisdom of meekness, by proper applications, to
disperse the humor before it comes to a head. One would have thought, when
David so deeply resented Nabal's abuse, that nothing less than the blood of
Nabal and all his house could have quenched his rage; but it was done at a
cheaper rate; and he showed his meekness by yielding to the diversion that
Abigail's present and speech gave him, and that with satisfaction and
thankfulness. He was not only soon pacified, but blessed her, and blessed
God for her that pacified him. God does not contend forever, neither is He
always angry; "His anger endures but a moment." How unlike Him are those
whose sword devours forever, and whose anger burns like the coals of
juniper! But the grace of meekness, if it fail of keeping the peace of the
soul from being broken, yet fails not to recover it presently, and make up
the breach; and upon the least transport, brings help in time of need,
restores the soul, puts it in frame again, and no great harm is done. Such
as these are the achievements of meekness in governing our own anger.
2. Meekness teaches and enables us patiently to bear
the anger of others, which property of meekness we have especially
occasion for in reference to our superiors and equals.
Commonly that which provokes anger is anger, as fire kindles fire; now
meekness prevents that violent collision which forces out these sparks, and
softens at least one side, and so puts a stop to a great deal of mischief;
for it is the second blow that makes the quarrel. Our first concern should
be to prevent the anger of others by giving no offense to any, but becoming
all things to all men, everyone studying to please his neighbor for good to
edification, Rom. 15:2, and endeavoring as much as lies in us to accommodate
ourselves to the temper of all with whom we have to do, and to make
ourselves acceptable and agreeable to them. How easy and comfortable should
we make every relation and all our dealings if we were but better acquainted
with this are of obliging. Naphtali's tribe, that was famous for giving
goodly words, Gen. 49:21, had the happiness of being satisfied with favor,
Deut. 33:23; for "every man shall kiss his lips that gives a right answer."
In the conjugal relation it is taken for granted that the care of the
husband is to please his wife, and the care of the wife is to please her
husband, 1 Cor. 7:33, 34; and where there is that mutual care, enjoyment
cannot be lacking. Some people love to be unkind, and take a pleasure in
displeasing, and especially contrive to provoke those they find passionate
and easily provoked, that—as he that gives his neighbor drink, and puts his
bottle to him, Hab. 2:15, 16—they may look upon his shame, to which, in his
passion, he exposes himself; and so they make a mock at sin, and become like
the madman that casts firebrands, arrows, and death, and says, "Am not I in
sport?" But the law of Christ forbids us to provoke one another, unless it
is "to love and good works;" and enjoins us to "bear one another's burdens,
and so fulfill the law of Christ."
But because they must rise early who will please
everybody, and carry their cup even indeed who will give no offense, our
next concern must be to behave ourselves in such a way that when others are
angry, that we may not make bad worse. And this is one principal thing in
which the younger must submit themselves to the elder; no, in which all of
us must be "subject one to another," as our rule is in 1 Pet. 5:5. And here
meekness is of use, either to enjoin silence or indite a soft answer.
1. To enjoin silence. It is prescribed to servants
to please their masters well in all things, "not answering again," for that
is displeasing: better say nothing than say that which is provoking. When
our hearts are hot within us, it is good for us to keep silence, and hold
our peace: so David did; and when he did speak, it was in prayer to God, and
not in reply to the wicked that were before him. If the heart is angry,
angry words will inflame it the more, as wheels are heated by a rapid
motion. One reflection and repartee begets another, and the beginning of the
debate is like the letting forth of water, which is with difficulty stopped
when the least breach is made in the bank; and therefore meekness says, "By
all means keep silence, and leave it off before it is meddled with." When a
fire is begun, it is good, if possible, to smother it, and so prevent its
spreading. Let us deal wisely, and stifle it in the birth, lest afterwards
it prove too strong to be dealt with. Anger in the heart is like the books
stowed in cellars in the conflagration of London, which, though they were
extremely heated, never took fire until they took air many days after, which
giving vent to the heat, put them into a flame. When the spirits are in a
ferment, though it may be some present pain to check and suppress them, and
the headstrong passions hardly admit the bridle, yet afterwards it will be
no grief of heart to us.
Those who find themselves wronged and aggrieved, think
they may have permission to speak; but it is better to be silent than to
speak amiss, and make work for repentance. At such a time he that holds his
tongue holds his peace; and if we soberly reflect, we shall find we have
been often the worse for our speaking, but seldom the worse for our
silence. This must be especially remembered and observed by as many as
are under the yoke, who will certainly have most comfort in meekness and
patience and silent submission, not only to the good and gentle, but also to
the froward. It is good in such cases to remember our place, and if the
spirit of a ruler rise up against us, not to leave it, that is, not to do
any thing unbecoming; for yielding pacifies great offenses. Eccl. 10:4. We
have a common proverb that teaches us this: "When you are the hammer, knock
your fill; but when you are the anvil, lie still;" for it is the posture you
are cut out for, and which best becomes you.
If others are angry with us without cause, and we have
ever so much reason on our side, yet often it is best to delay our own
vindication, though we think it necessary, until the passion is over; for
there is nothing said or done in passion, but it may be better said and
better done afterwards. When we are calm, we shall be likely to say it and
do it in a better manner; and when our brother is calm, we shall be likely
to say it and do it to a better purpose. A needful truth spoken in anger
may do more hurt than good, and offend rather than satisfy. The prophet
himself forbore even a message from God when he saw Amaziah in a passion.
Sometimes it may be advisable to get some one else to say that for us which
is to be said, rather than say it ourselves. However, we have a righteous
God, to whom, if in a meek silence we allow ourselves to be injured, we may
commit our cause, and having his promise that He will "bring forth our
righteousness as the light, and our judgment as the noonday," we had better
leave it in His hands than undertake to manage it ourselves, lest that which
we call clearing ourselves, God should call quarreling with our brethren.
David was greatly provoked by those that sought his hurt, and spoke
mischievous things against him; and yet says he, "I, as a deaf man, heard
not; I was as a dumb man, that opens not his mouth." And why so? It was not
because he had nothing to say, or knew not how to say it, but because "in
You, O Lord, do I hope: You will hear, O Lord my God." If God hear, what
need have I to hear? His concerning Himself in the matter supersedes ours,
and He is not only engaged in justice to own every righteous cause that is
injured, but He is further engaged in honor to appear for those who, in
obedience to the law of meekness, commit their cause to Him. If any
vindication or avenging is necessary—which infinite Wisdom is the best judge
of—He can do it better than we can; therefore "give place unto wrath," that
is, to the judgment of God, which is according to truth and equity; make
room for Him to take the seat, and do not step in before Him. It is fit that
our wrath should stand by to give way to his, for the wrath of man engages
not the righteousness of God for him. Even just appeals made to Him, if they
are made in passion, are not admitted into the court of heaven, being not
duly presented; that one thing, error, is sufficient to overrule them. Let
not therefore those that do well and suffer for it, spoil their own
vindication by mistiming and mismanaging it; but tread in the steps of the
Lord Jesus, who, when He was reviled, reviled not again; when He suffered,
He threatened not; but was as a lamb dumb before the shearers, and so
committed Himself to Him that judges righteously. It is indeed a principal
part of self-denial to be silent when we have enough to say, and provocation
to say it; but if we do thus control our tongues out of a pure regard to
peace and love, it will turn to a good account, and will be an evidence for
us that we are Christ's disciples, having learned to deny ourselves. It is
better by silence to yield to our brother who is, or has been, or may be our
friend, than by angry speaking to yield to the devil, who has been, and is,
and ever will be our sworn enemy.
2. To give a soft answer. This Solomon commends as
a proper expedient to turn away wrath, while grievous words do but stir up
anger. When any speak angrily to us, we must pause a while and study an
answer, which, both for the matter and manner of it, may be mild and gentle.
This brings water, while peevishness and provocation would but bring oil to
the flame. Thus is death and life in the power of the tongue; it is either
healing or killing, an antidote or a poison, according as it is used. When
the waves of the sea beat on a rock, they batter and make a noise, but a
soft sand receives them silently, and returns them without damage. A soft
tongue is a wonderful specific, and has a very strange virtue in it. Solomon
says, "It breaks the bone," that is, it qualifies those that were provoked,
and makes them pliable; it "heaps coals of fire upon the head" of an enemy,
not to burn him, but to melt him. "Hard words," we say, "break
no bones;" but it seems soft ones do, and yet do no harm, as they calm an
angry spirit and prevent its progress. A stone that falls on a wool-pack
rests there, and rebounds not to do any further mischief; such is a meek
answer to an angry question.
The good effects of a soft answer, and the bad
consequences of a peevish one, are observable in the stories of Gideon and
Jephthah: both of them, in the day of their triumphs over the enemies of
Israel, were quarreled with by the Ephraimites, when the danger was past and
the victory won, because they had not been called upon to engage in the
battle. Gideon pacified them with a soft answer: "What have I done now in
comparison to you?" magnifying their achievements and lessening his own,
speaking honorably of them and meanly of himself: "Is not the gleaning of
the grapes of Ephraim better than the vintage of Abiezer?" In which reply it
is hard to say whether there was more of wit or wisdom; and the effect was
very good: the Ephraimites were pleased, their anger turned away, a civil
war prevented, and nobody could think the worse of Gideon for his mildness
and self-denial. On the contrary, he won more true honor by his victory over
his own passion, than he did by his victory over all the host of Midian; for
he that has rule over his own spirit is better than the mighty. The angel of
the Lord has pronounced him a "mighty man of valor;" and this his tame
submission did not at all derogate from that part of his character. But
Jephthah, who by many instances appears to be a man of a rough and hasty
spirit, though enrolled among the eminent believers, Heb. 11:32—for all good
people are not alike happy in their temper—when the Ephraimites in like
manner quarrel with him, rallies them, rebukes them for their cowardice,
boasts of his own courage, and challenges them to make good their cause.
Judg. 12:2. They retort a scurrilous reflection upon Jephthah's country, as
it is usual with passion to taunt and jeer: "You Gileadites are fugitives."
From words they go to blows, and so great a matter does this little fire
kindle, that there goes no less to quench the flame than the blood of
forty-two thousand Ephraimites. All which had been happily prevented, if
Jephthah had had but half as much meekness in his heart as he had reason on
his side.
A soft answer is the dictate and dialect of that wisdom
which is from above, which is peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated;
and to recommend it to us, we have the pattern of good men, as that of
Jacob's conduct to Esau. Though none is so hard to be won as a brother
offended, yet, as he had prevailed with God by faith and prayer, so he
prevailed with his brother by meekness and humility. We have also the
pattern of angels, who, even when a rebuke was needful, dared not turn it
into a railing accusation, dared not give any reviling language, not to the
devil himself, but referred the matter to God: "The Lord rebuke
you;" as that passage in Jude 9 is commonly understood. More so, we have the
pattern of a good God, who, though He could plead against us with His great
power, yet gives soft answers: witness His dealing with Cain when he was
wroth and his countenance fallen, reasoning the case with him: "Why are you
angry? If you do well, will you not be accepted?" With Jonah likewise when
he was so discontented: "Is it right for you to be angry?" This is
represented, in the parable of the prodigal son, by the conduct of the
father towards the elder brother, who was so angry that he would not come
in. The father did not say, "Let him stay out then;" but he came himself and
entreated him, when he might have interposed his authority and commanded
him, saying, "Son, you are ever with me." When a passionate contest is
begun, there is a plague broke out: the meek man, like Aaron, takes his
censer with the incense of a soft answer, steps in seasonably, and stays it.
This soft answer, in case we have committed a fault,
though perhaps not culpable to the degree that we are charged with, must be
penitent, humble, and submissive; and we must be ready to acknowledge our
error, and not stand in it, or insist upon our own vindication; but rather
aggravate than excuse it, rather condemn than justify ourselves. It will be
a good evidence of our repentance towards God, to humble ourselves to our
brethren whom we have offended, as it will be also a good evidence of our
being forgiven of God, if we are ready to forgive those that have offended
us; and such yielding pacifies great offenses. Meekness teaches us, as often
as we trespass against our brother, to "turn again and say, I repent." An
acknowledgment, in case of a willful affront, is perhaps as necessary to
pardon, as, we commonly say, restitution is in case of wrong.
So much for the opening of the nature of meekness, which
yet will receive further light from considering more particularly what is
implied in—
QUIETNESS OF SPIRIT.
Quietness is the evenness, the composure and the rest of
the soul, which speaks both the nature and the excellency of the grace of
meekness. The greatest comfort and happiness of man is sometimes set forth
by quietness. That peace of conscience which Christ has left for a legacy to
his disciples, that present sabbatism of the soul which is an earnest of the
rest that remains for the people of God, is called "quietness and assurance
forever," and is promised as the effect of righteousness. So graciously has
God been pleased to entwine interests with us, as to enjoin the same thing
as a duty which He proposes and promises as a privilege. Justly may we say
that we serve a good Master, whose "Yoke is easy:" it is not only easy, but
sweet and gracious, so the word signifies; not only tolerable, but amiable
and acceptable. Wisdom's ways are not only pleasant, but pleasantness
itself, and all her paths are peace. It is the character of the Lord's
people, both in respect to holiness and happiness, that, however they are
branded as the troublers of Israel, they are "the quiet in the land." If
every saint is made a spiritual prince, Rev. 1:6, having a dignity above
others and a dominion over himself, surely he is like Seraiah, "a quiet
prince." It is a reign with Christ, the transcendent Solomon, under the
influence of whose golden scepter there is "abundance of peace as long as
the moon endures," yes, and longer, for "of the increase of his government
and peace there shall be no end." Quietness is recommended as a grace which
we should be endued with, and a duty which we should practice. In the midst
of all the affronts and injuries that are or can be offered us, we must keep
our spirits sedate and undisturbed, and evidence by a calm and even and
regular behavior that they are so. This is quietness. Our Savior has
pronounced the blessing of adoption upon the peacemakers, Matt. 5:9; those
that are for peace, as David professes himself to be, in opposition to those
that delight in war. Psalm 120:7. Now, if charity is for peace-making,
surely this "charity begins at home," and is for making peace there in the
first place. Peace in our own souls is some conformity to the example of the
God of peace, who, though He does not always give peace on this earth, yet
evermore "makes peace in his own high places." This some think is the
primary intention of that peace-making on which Christ commands the
blessing: it is to have strong and hearty affections to peace, to be
peaceably-minded. In a word, quietness of spirit is the soul's stillness and
silence from intending provocation to any, or resenting provocation from any
with whom we have to do.
The word has something in it of metaphor, which admirably
illustrates the grace of meekness.
1. We must be quiet as the air is quiet from winds.
Disorderly passions are like stormy winds in the soul, they toss and
hurry it, and often strand or overset it; they move it "as the trees of the
forest are moved with the wind;" it is the prophet's comparison, and is an
apt emblem of a man in passion. Now meekness restrains these winds, says to
them, Peace, be still, and so preserves a calm in the soul, and makes it
conformable to Him who has the winds in his hands, and is herein to be
praised that even the stormy winds fulfill his word. A brisk gale is often
useful, especially to the ship of desire, as the Hebrew phrase is in Job
9:26; so there should be in the soul such a warmth and vigor as will help to
speed us to the desired harbor. It is not well to lie wind-bound in dullness
and indifference; but tempests are perilous, yes, though the wind is in the
right point. So are strong passions, even in good men; they both hinder the
voyage and hazard the ship. Such a quickness as consists with quietness is
what we should all labor after, and meekness will contribute very much
towards it; it will silence the noise, control the force, moderate the
impetus, and correct undue and disorderly transports. What manner of
grace is this, that even the winds and the sea obey it! If we will but use
the authority God has given us over our own hearts, we may keep the winds of
passion under the command of religion and reason; and then the soul is
quiet, the sun shines, all is pleasant, serene, and smiling, and the man
sleeps sweetly and safely on the lee-side. We make our voyage among rocks
and quicksands, but if the weather is calm, we can the better steer so as to
avoid them, and by a due care and temper strike the mean between extremes;
whereas he that allows these winds of passion to get head, and spreads a
large sail before them, while he shuns one rock, splits upon another, and is
in danger of being drowned in destruction and perdition by many foolish and
hurtful lusts, especially those whence wars and fightings come.
2. We must be quiet as the sea is quiet from waves.
The wicked, whose sin and punishment both lie in the unruliness of their
own souls, and the violence and disorder of their own passions, which
perhaps will not be the least of their eternal torments, are compared to
"the troubled sea, when it cannot rest, whose waters cast up mire and dirt;"
that is, they are uneasy to themselves and to all about them, "raging waves
of the sea, foaming out their own shame;" their hard speeches which they
speak against God and dignities and things which they know not, their great
swelling words and mockings, Jude 13, 18, these are the shame they foam out.
Now meekness is a grace of the Spirit, that moves upon the face of the
waters and quiets them, smooths the ruffled sea and stills the noise of it;
it casts forth none of the mire and dirt of passion. The waves mount not up
to heaven in proud and vainglorious boasting; they go not down to the depths
to scrape up vile and scurrilous language: there is no reeling to and fro,
as men overcome with drink or with their own passion; there is none of that
transport which brings them to their wits' end; but "they are glad because
they are quiet; so He brings them to their desired haven." This calmness and
evenness of spirit makes our passage over the sea of this world safe and
pleasant, quick and speedy towards the desired harbor, and is amiable and
exemplary in the eyes of others.
3. We must be quiet as the land is quiet from war.
It was the observable happiness of Asa's reign, that "in his days the land
was quiet." In the preceding reigns there was no peace to him that went out,
or to him that came in; but now the rumors and alarms of war were stilled,
and the people delivered from the noise of archers at the place of drawing
waters, as when the land had rest in Deborah's time. Such a quietness there
should be in the soul, and such a quietness there will be where meekness
sways the scepter. A soul inflamed with wrath and passion upon all
occasions, is like a kingdom embroiled in war, in a civil war, subject to
continual frights and losses and perils; deaths and terrors in their most
horrid shapes walk triumphantly, sleep is disturbed, families broken,
friends suspected, enemies feared, laws silenced, commerce ruined, business
neglected, cities wasted: such heaps upon heaps does ungoverned anger lay,
when it is let loose in the soul. But meekness makes these wars to cease,
breaks the bow, cuts the spear, sheathes the sword, and in the midst of a
contentious world preserves the soul from being the seat of war, and makes
peace in her borders. The rest of the soul is not disturbed, its comforts
not plundered, its government not disordered; the laws of religion and
reason rule, and not the sword; neither its communion with God nor with the
saints interrupted; no breaking in of temptation, no going out of
corruption, no complaining in the streets; no occasion given, no occasion
taken, to complain. Happy is the soul that is in such a case. The words of
such wise men are heard in quiet, more than the cry of him that rules among
fools, and this "wisdom is better than weapons of war." This is the
quietness we should every one of us labor after; and it is what we might
attain to, if we would but more support and exercise the authority of our
graces, and guide and control the power of our passions.
4. We must be quiet as the child is quiet after
weaning. It is the Psalmist's comparison: "I have behaved," or rather, I
have composed, "and quieted myself as a child that is weaned of his mother;
my soul is even as a weaned child." A child, while it is in the weaning,
perhaps is a little cross and froward and troublesome for a time; but when
it is perfectly weaned, how quickly does it accommodate itself to its new
way of feeding. Thus a quiet soul, if provoked by the denial or loss of some
earthly comfort or delight, quiets itself, and does not fret at it, nor
perplex itself with anxious cares how to live without it, but composes
itself to make the best of that which is. And this holy indifference to the
delights of sense is, like the weaning of a child, a good step taken towards
the perfect man, "the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ." A
child newly weaned is free from all the uneasiness and disquietude of care
and fear and anger and revenge: how undisturbed are its sleeps, and
even in its dreams it looks pleasant and smiling. How easy its days; how
quiet its nights. If put into a little sulk now and then, how soon it
is over, the provocation forgiven, the sense of it forgotten, and both
buried in an innocent kiss. Thus, if ever we would enter into the kingdom of
heaven, we must be converted from pride, envy, ambition, and strife
for precedency, and must become like little children. So our Savior has told
us, who, even after His resurrection, is called "the holy child Jesus." And
even when we have put away other childish things, yet still "in malice" we
must be children. And as for the quarrels of others, a meek and quiet
Christian endeavors to be as unselfish and as little engaged as a weaned
child in the mother's arms, that is not capable of such angry resentments.
This is that meekness and quietness of spirit which is
recommended to us: such a command and composure of the soul that it does not
become unhinged by any provocation whatever, but all its powers and
faculties preserved in due temper for the just discharge of their respective
offices. In a word, put off all wrath and anger and malice, those corrupted
limbs of the old man; pluck up and cast away those roots of bitterness, and
stand upon a constant guard against all the exorbitances of your own
passion: then you will soon know, to your comfort, better than I can tell
you, what it is to be of a meek and quiet spirit.